C day - #1

OK, yesterday's post was edited today and somehow it now has today's date.

Anyway, it was my first day of chemo today, April 19th.  I check in 8:30 a.m. and get a private room.  I thought about bringing my laptop with me so I could journal during treatment but after experiencing the ache and burning in my arm with the IV, I doubt I'll be multi-tasking much.  That's unfortunate, because today I learn that after a few treatments, the chemo will have an effect on my speech, thinking, memory, etc, etc.  The Infusion RN continues ad nauseum about certain and potential side effects. She's a very kind RN, but what she is saying are words that are not designed to make me feel comfortable.  She ends the list of crazy side effects and then instructs me to practice NEW START:  Nutrition, Eating. Walking, Sunshine (indirect, I'm like a Vampire now), Temperance, Air, Rest, and I can't remember what the last "T" is for.  Must be the chemo working already.

Pyung, she's the RN, inserts an IV into my wrist and starts with a saline IV drip that will push the "medicine" through gently.  They won't be inserting a port in me that can be worn 24/7.  It's for patients that have aggressive cancers and need the chemo more frequently.  I'm only going every other Monday.  I'm pretty fortunate.  This makes me think of a friend's mom who is receiving treatment for cancer right now and has a port.  Wow, my heart goes out to her.


I am given pills to take first.  Zofran, my new best friend, for the prevention of nausea, and dexamethasone, my kryptonite.  Steroids and I don't play nice together.  It turns my stomach to knots and feels like heartburn, whether I take it with food or not.  I try to negotiate with Pyung, that I'd rather not take it and just stick to the Zofran.  She's not negotiable.  There I go playing God again.

Now we are starting with the ABVD, the chemo regimen.  It's a kinder, gentler toxic cocktail than the old MOPP they used to use for Hokgkins that actually was a form of mustard gas.  ABVD is also used for leukemias and sarcomas.  The first chemical to go in me is Vinblastine.  I like the "blast" in the middle of the word.  Sounds like it's going to do some heavy duty work in me; no slacking around in there.  She inserts a fat needle into the IV line and slowly injects the formula into me.  It takes about 15 minutes.  It's then followed by Adriamycin and Bleomycin in the same manner.  One of those two (again, I can't remember) is red and creates a metallic taste in my mouth.  I am given water to drink, but it's metallic, too.  Bizarre.

The final one is Dacarbazine,  This is the one to watch out for.  It is the one that is most responsible for the serious side effects such as headache, diarrhea, fatigue and the nauseau and vomiting I so fear the most.  It is administered through an IV drip.  It's entering my bloodstream so fast though, that I am experiencing burning and and instant rash forms along my left arm, chest and neck.  I can't stop scratching.  Pyung had since left the room so it's just me, the rash and my fingernails.  She walks in on my scratchfest a few minutes later, instructs me to stop scratching and gets me some benedryl.  It helps almost instantly.  Amen; I thought I was starting to reach bone with my nails.

It's just past 11:00 a.m. and I'm finished.  Wow, only 2.5 hours of ports, needles and IVs.  Excellent.  This wasn't a bad day at all.  The doctor had come by to see me earlier, the Pharmacist paid me a visit to discuss the medication and Alex, my brother, visited two times between his surgeries.  The nurses all stand at attention when he comes by.  It's his dashing good looks.  Makes them melt.  Also makes them treat me better.  I'm using the "my brother's a handsome elligible doctor" card for all it's worth.

Don has been by my side the whole morning.  He's my rock.  We go home, no one throws up, and we both compete for who can take the longest nap.  He wins.  I'm glad to see him well rested.  He's been working 7 days a week AND taking care of me.  Good thing I'm not a demanding patient.  Don brings me my mixed vegetable soup from Follow Your Heart and I am happy.

I am having the best end to my day ever,  My dear, sweet Don, with his acoustic guitar (my favorite sound) sits on the bed and plays for me.  Then he plays a song he's just written for me, about me, about us.  About how we are in this together Wow, I am a very lucky girl.  They say what does not kill us makes us stronger and here's the living proof.  The cancer isn't testing our marriage, it's solidifying it.

I don't need pleasant dreams; I'm living them.